Meet Cutes and Meet Uglies


Meet Cute #8: Alex and the Mystery Emailer / Feb 12

I thought it was junk mail at first. The subject line was “Hi there Alex,” which is my name, and because it was in my spam folder surrounded by asterisks and capital letters and promises of great sex, I figured it was one more crazy thing, undeserving of a second glance. Still, I was having […]



Meet Cute #7: The Agent and the Manuscript / Feb 11

Yolanda the literary agent sat on the bus, staring at her inert smartphone. Her thumb trembled over the screen. She simply couldn’t bring herself to check her email. She was actually afraid of her inbox now, the endless uptick of New Messages she’d encounter each time. Was there a term for that? A fear of […]



Meet Cute #6: The Therapist and the Client / Feb 10

The woman was red-faced and flipping off the driver in front of her when Dr. Judith Redmond pulled up next to her at the stoplight. Dr. Redmond thought of the woman as Dani, because that’s what the woman’s vanity plates said: Dani88. Dr. Redmond rolled down her window. Dani’s windows were already open, a rock […]



Meet Cute #5: The Building and the High-Reach Demolition Excavator / Feb 07

I was excited when I heard the state was taking down the old Central Cold Storage building downtown. I can see the building from my office, so I thought: Hey, free show. One day, the demolition guys drove a wrecking ball truck to the site. The truck sidled up to the building and the ball hung […]



Meet Cute #4: Gloria Swanson and Billy Wilder / Feb 06

*Note: In 1949, legendary film director Billy Wilder cast actress Gloria Swanson, then 49, as the star of his classic Sunset Boulevard. The events below are based on the actual events leading up to their meeting, though of course I’ve taken liberty with dialogue and details! 1. HOSPITAL ROOM, NEW YORK CITY, INTERIOR, DAY. December 1948. GLORIA […]



Meet Cute #3: Ghost Bill and Ghost Rachel / Feb 05

When I met Rachel — well, officially, at least — I’d been haunting the house much longer than she had. Almost two decades, in fact. I had died in 1970, the year before Rachel was born. My neighbor murdered me when I was a young man of 29. I suppose that’s why I ended up […]



Meet Cute #2: The Pug and the Doberman / Feb 04

One day, Candy Three Snoops was snurfling and snuffling along the sidewalk outside her house. Her owner had let her out a few minutes before to “go potty,” which she understood to mean urinating. She obliged only about half the time, and today was not one of them. A large dog rounded the corner ahead. […]



Meet Cute #1: Trixie and the Indie Rock Musician / Feb 03

Her name was Trixie, and that right there caused problems. “Trixie as in the cereal?” I asked. I was on stage, packing up my gear, sweaty from playing my show. It’s just me and my guitar, and this was a big club. I felt like I had to strum and yowl and stomp extra loud […]